Saturday, 10 December 2011

Why It Is Good For a Man to Be Just Friends With a Woman

Quite often you will hear the debate about whether or not it is good for men and women to be just friends. Now, I won't delve into the area of whether or not committed couples should have close opposite sex friends. What I want to explore is whether or not single men can benefit from being just friends with a woman. To be upfront about it, my position is that it is one of the best things that a man can do. Most guys have too few female friends and they pay a price for this.

It's not uncommon for a man to reach his mid twenties without really having much of a grasp at all on how the female mind works. It's all too common for guys to look at women as being only possible mates and nothing more. While some of that definitely is due to the way that we are "wired" to be, a lot of that also has to do with societal conditioning that separates the girls and the boys at a young age. So, it is not entirely natural for things to be that way.

Here's why I think it is beneficial for a guy to be just friends with a woman:

I alluded to why in the previous paragraph, but I will expand on it here. As I mentioned, it's pretty routine for a man to reach into his mid twenties and even beyond that age and still have absolutely no clue as to the way that women really are. These guys will instead possess an idealized image of the way that they think women should be like, and many times this prevents them from really having quality relationships.

Had they had more opposite sex friendships, they probably would lose that idealized image of the way that women are "supposed" to be. I know I did. What happens when a guy gets to have some insights into the ways that women really think and feel and act is... he gets to see a much more realistic picture and so, when he gets into a long term relationship, there are far fewer surprises that cause conflicts.

There is also the fact that men and women tend to socialize in a slightly different manner and this is where it really becomes beneficial for a guy to have female friends, because in order to get into that long term relationship... he has to know how to make a woman feel attracted to him. As a teenager, I did not start off with too many female friends and I honestly had no clues at all about how to make a girl like me.

By the time I reached my late teens, I had made many female friends and all of a sudden, it seemed pretty easy to create attraction with a woman. It all came from the fact that I had learned through my female friends and their experiences with guys, what worked and what did not work. I wasn't one of those guys that got locker room advice from the fellas who had no greater clue than I did... I got REAL insights that showed me what worked like a charm and what to avoid at all costs.

In being just friends with women, a guy not only picks up insights that will make him more successful with women, he also gets insights into what women actually are like in all their moments, not just a few snips here and there. That is something that guys who do not have female friends just do not get to experience and it ends up causing them lots of heartaches, lots of confusion, and lots of lonely nights.

When should a guy make it a point to pick up some female friends?

The earlier the better in my opinion. However, when he is really trying to get women figured out, that is probably the BEST time possible. So many guys get to a point where they really desire to have a girlfriend, but they are stuck in catch 22 kind of situation, because their lack of female friends means they lack the ability to create real attraction with women and to know what little social cues to use to make that attraction grow to where she wants to be their girlfriend.


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Friday, 9 December 2011

Make Friends and Meet People Washington DC

When I was transferred here for my job, I really wanted to Meet People Washington DC. I didn't care that much about meeting a man as I was in just making friends. I made several friends with people in my office, but I am very guarded about letting co-workers know too much about my personal life because that got me into sensitive situations in the past.


I'm not into social networking any more but when I was I allowed my co-workers to "friend" me. That gave them access to where I was and a whole bunch of other personal information that was none of their business. I only "friended" them because I was new to the company and though it would be rude to reject their friend request. I have since closed my account and no one can know my business any longer. But let's get back to my meet people in Washington DC. 


Thank God I'm an incredibly open and friendly person who doesn't mind striking up a conversation with a woman working on her computer at a coffee place. Or if I see someone holding a tennis racquet, I'll ask him or her where they play tennis and ask for their phone number so that I can get more information about their tennis club. Then during that conversation - especially if it's a woman - I'll then ask them if they want to play together. To Meet People Washington DC and gather a nice, fun group of friends isn't that hard. You just have to be open to the idea of making friends.


The question is where to meet people? If you're shy and not as outgoing as I am, don't worry. There are social networking sites that organize events such as hiking trips, dancing lessons, wine tasting, and so many more great activities.


So if you're the shy type, sign up with those sites and Meet People Washington DC. Believe me, there are so many people out there that are shy as well just dying to make friends and meet new people. So get in front of your computer and search for the social networking sites. I've gone to several of their events and they're terrific!


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Thursday, 8 December 2011

The Most Shocking Email I Ever Received. How I Grow From It

Now for respect reasons for you, the reader, I will not be copying the email here for everyone to see. It is not pretty so I will try to make the point as clear as I can.


Last year I was starting to have many problems with my daughter, who was then 16. She was rebelling and not following pretty serious rules and this carried on all spring and into the winter so I had to follow what I thought best as a parent, as we all do. Now, I was also planning for my own wedding that I was putting on myself in my backyard in October. My daughter was to be my maid of honor which meant she should help, right?


That was fine at the time. I just wanted for us to be okay and her to follow my rules and we were really trying hard to work it out with compromise. Each new thing worked for a small time period and then, boom, back at square one. So stressful at the time. I was losing weight but not in the healthy way.


I was always asking for and receiving advice all the time and some did help. One huge role in my daughter's life is my mother who has been a big influence since she was born, since I was only 18 when I had her.


The wedding came and went. It was absolutely perfect. Then shortly after my daughter was continuing on breaking the rules as usual. No honeymoon as you can imagine. In November my daughter had been living other places but also breaking rules and doing just what she wanted when she wanted so we had to keep taking it to the next level.


I ended up kicking her out in December. She had a full time social worker who had been absolutely wonderful for both of us throughout this. She then started her adventures of teen shelters. She bounced through 3 total because, yes, she didn't follow rules.


My mother, apparently had some feelings she was not sharing with me at the time and let them build up until December 23rd after midnight, probably after a few cocktails. I, of course got the email on Christmas Eve when I had to spend the day alone. Not pretty for most of the day.


It basically stated my whole name, my maiden name, and yelling at me how disappointed she was in me and slamming me for every mistake I ever made as a young mother and what a horrible person I was and she did not care to speak to me again. That sums it up. I was mortified.


I responded to the tune of, I hope you find yourself someday and isn't it funny how the school and social workers all support me. My husband responded in a very different manner, which also cannot be repeated.


I still have not heard an apology or have I talked to her since. I think maybe someday she will sincerely apologize but knowing her, I just don't know.


The moral to the story is that is changed my life by opening my eyes to the fact that you are only as good as the people you surround yourself with and that does include your family. I went on to educate myself through an online marketing community that is just full of the most amazingly supportive people I have ever known. The world really is a big place and in the past year I have learned to stop letting others drag me down with them.


I will leave it at that for now because I will being writing more on all the moments and relationships that have changed my life in the last year.


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Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Who to Attend a New Years Eve Dance Washington DC With

If you are planning on going to a New Years Eve Dance Washington DC, and you are unsure of who to bring with you, this article will help you decide on an answer to that question.

What is your main goal for meeting people at the event?  Would you say you are especially interested in meeting new people, open to meeting new people but fine if you do not, or not intending on meeting new people?  If you are interested in meeting new people at a New Years Gala, it does not matter whether or not you bring a friend or group of friends; the same goes for if you are open but it does not matter.  If you are not intent on meeting new people, you should bring a date, a friend, or go with a group of friends so that you are not alone.

Are you interested in meeting singles at a New Years Eve Dance Washington DC?  If so, you could bring a friend or a group of friends.  It will be nice to have your possible future date meet your friends and see you "in your element".  Plus, your friend(s) could always help introduce you to new people.  If you come with one or two friends of the opposite sex, it may appear to others as if you already have a date.  Either way, as long as you look like you are having fun, you will be more approachable, and you are more likely to be smiling and laughing with your friends.

If you are not really interested in meeting singles at the New Years Gala Dinner, that is fine.  You should always be open to making new friends.  Coming with a group of close guy or girl friends or with other couples is a great way to enjoy the night.  Who knows, you might just introduce your friend to the new love of their life!

Couples are encouraged to come with their partners to the New Years Eve Dance Washington DC.  You will have the time of your life, and you do not want the love of your life to miss out on any of it.


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