The Most Shocking Email I Ever Received. How I Grow From It

Now for respect reasons for you, the reader, I will not be copying the email here for everyone to see. It is not pretty so I will try to make the point as clear as I can.

Last year I was starting to have many problems with my daughter, who was then 16. She was rebelling and not following pretty serious rules and this carried on all spring and into the winter so I had to follow what I thought best as a parent, as we all do. Now, I was also planning for my own wedding that I was putting on myself in my backyard in October. My daughter was to be my maid of honor which meant she should help, right?

That was fine at the time. I just wanted for us to be okay and her to follow my rules and we were really trying hard to work it out with compromise. Each new thing worked for a small time period and then, boom, back at square one. So stressful at the time. I was losing weight but not in the healthy way.

I was always asking for and receiving advice all the time and some did help. One huge role in my daughter's life is my mother who has been a big influence since she was born, since I was only 18 when I had her.

The wedding came and went. It was absolutely perfect. Then shortly after my daughter was continuing on breaking the rules as usual. No honeymoon as you can imagine. In November my daughter had been living other places but also breaking rules and doing just what she wanted when she wanted so we had to keep taking it to the next level.

I ended up kicking her out in December. She had a full time social worker who had been absolutely wonderful for both of us throughout this. She then started her adventures of teen shelters. She bounced through 3 total because, yes, she didn't follow rules.

My mother, apparently had some feelings she was not sharing with me at the time and let them build up until December 23rd after midnight, probably after a few cocktails. I, of course got the email on Christmas Eve when I had to spend the day alone. Not pretty for most of the day.

It basically stated my whole name, my maiden name, and yelling at me how disappointed she was in me and slamming me for every mistake I ever made as a young mother and what a horrible person I was and she did not care to speak to me again. That sums it up. I was mortified.

I responded to the tune of, I hope you find yourself someday and isn't it funny how the school and social workers all support me. My husband responded in a very different manner, which also cannot be repeated.

I still have not heard an apology or have I talked to her since. I think maybe someday she will sincerely apologize but knowing her, I just don't know.

The moral to the story is that is changed my life by opening my eyes to the fact that you are only as good as the people you surround yourself with and that does include your family. I went on to educate myself through an online marketing community that is just full of the most amazingly supportive people I have ever known. The world really is a big place and in the past year I have learned to stop letting others drag me down with them.

I will leave it at that for now because I will being writing more on all the moments and relationships that have changed my life in the last year.

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Ways to Make a Great First Impression

We are all looking for genuine ways to connect with others, build lasting relationships and expand our networking circle. So when is a good time to network, promote or brand yourself? How about whenever you are out in the world, standing in line at the grocery store, or in an environment where a lot of people are.

You are always networking and building relationships so focus on getting to know people that can be of value to you and that you can be of value to them. So how do you go about making a great first impression?

Most people go to networking events with the intention of telling someone about their service or product, or giving them their elevator pitch and hope that someone says; "I need that or I know someone that needs that." You are entering a new environment from a stand point that is one sided or greedy. You are approaching the situation from a self serving position and you are only thinking about what you can get from them.

First you need to develop visibility, credibility, and profitability. If you were to turn the self serving approach around and say, "how can I be of service or help you," the outcome would be very different and extremely beneficial to all parties involved.

You are going to have to go out in the world and be of benefit to others, this creates visibility. The need to be able to talk about what you do is very important, but not right from the beginning. You need to build credibility with the other person or networking group. They need to know that if you offer them something, you can deliver. "Success comes from making promises and keeping them." Jack Canfield That builds trust, it builds relationships, which builds long term connectivity and profitability.

So once you've established a connection and get to know someone at an event or networking function, ask the question, "what do you need right now, what are the 2 most important projects you are working on right now?" What's the greatest challenge you are facing right now? Whatever it might be, find out what they need and then follow through.

Then the next question to ask is, "what can I do to help you get to where you want to go?" Here's an example. During a coaching session, I asked my client what they needed and how could I help them? My client was specific about what they needed as far as being more organized and having a step by step plan of accomplishing goals. I used techniques to provide them with organization and steps to stay on task. They received what they needed by way of organization and goal setting skills and I helped them get from where they are to were they wanted to be. You want to deliver what you've promised to deliver. Look at networking as the beginning of a relationship.

Also, you want to be able to tell them what you need. Be very clear about what it is you need. If you need help personally, like a job referral because your son needs work, or your need a consult because your mother has breast cancer. Or you may need financial assistance, like a financial advisor, there maybe a certain market you want to penetrate, a key initiative or important connection you want to start or meet. Whatever it is, be specific. You want to have maybe 2 very important and pressing matters addressed because you don't want to spread yourself thin and be all over the place.

Once you've established yourself with visibility and credibility, the profits will follow. You better believe that when you ask them for help, they are going to return the favor. Now that you've delivered on their concerns, this puts you in direct line to receive what you want. This is part of building a network of like minded professional individuals that will promote you and your products because of the trust, honor and friendship you've created.

The last thing you want to do is follow up. Many of us go to networking functions and collect a hand full of business cards and end up throwing them in a box, on your desk or putting a rubber band around them. Follow up with the potential connections, prospects, or clients. Make sure there is something you can do for them. Like provide them with a new product, send them one of your articles, or a news clipping you found out they were interested in, or send them a birthday card. You want to keep you on top of their mind.

Focus on creating a long term relationship. Your goal is to build a relationship. Ask the question as to how you can be of service to them. "If you help enough people get what they want, you will always have what you want." Zig Ziglar. Figure out how you can provide a solution to their problem and follow up. And remember to be clear about the challenge you want resolved about your life or current situation. This makes it a fair and even exchange were everybody gets what they want.

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A Woman With No Hometown

We moved so often when I was growing up in a U.S. Air Force family that packing our all our belongings and leaving town seemed a routine occurrence. Some of my earliest memories involve long car trips. Once, there was a long boat trip across the Atlantic to Germany.

My two younger sisters and I would sing songs we had learned in school for long periods, until dad would finally tell us to stop. We played the usual road games, and colored when we were younger. Reading wasn't a good idea, as it would usually lead to car sickness! 

There were no fast food restaurants in the 1940's, so we had lots of roadside picnics after shopping for fixings in local stores. There weren't Interstate highways either, so we drove through the main streets of towns along our route, sometimes stopping at local diners or restaurants for meals.

Upon arrival at our destination, we had to start all over again making new friends, and learning to get around our new schools and neighborhoods. We learned to rely on each other! The older we got the more difficult it seemed to break off tender buds of friendship, and to leave behind all that had become familiar.

We used to love the stories our mother told us about her own growing-up years in a small rural north Florida town, where she had lived since she was small. Everyone in town knew all there was to know about their neighbors! It was as foreign to us as another planet. We enjoyed visiting our mother's hometown, but it could not be the place for us that it had been for her.

In 1958, I graduated from Melbourne High School on Florida's east coast. I attended this school  from my junior year until my graduation. I met and married a young man from that area, and we had children and were together for many years. Still, I do not feel a deep attachment to my classmates, although I did form some friendships while I was there, and attended one reunion (the 30th).

My husband was in the U.S. Air Force when we married, having joined right after he graduated from high school, and we continued to move frequently. Even after he left the service, we continued to relocate frequently due to changes in our circumstances.  

We eventually moved to Tampa, along with our three eldest children, in the early '60s. The house in which I now live alone is one we bought together in 1964.  So I am now "settled" in my older years. 

My early life experiences have taught me some good lessons, and some not so good. 

The not-so-good lessons have been a rather detached disposition, since in my experience nothing is permanent, and a sense of there being something lacking when I hear others talking about friends they've had since childhood.

As for the good, I have lived in a number of different places, and perhaps I have acquired an education of sorts in having done so!

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Social Networking to Solve Friends Problems

In exploring ideas that leverage social networking to help common life situations, one idea that may be worth exploring is a system that lets friends share personal crises, problems, or challenges.

Social networks are usually driven by good, happy news about ourselves, not "I'm in trouble," "I have a personal crisis," etc. A system or an app can be developed that, with the right confidentiality settings, will enable friends to help each other with personal issues by tapping their collective experiences and contacts.

Perhaps these social apps would have much more controlled "broadcast" or "sharing" applications to get around the negative aspects of revealing a personal problem. Perhaps such systems would use a few close friends to be the "fronts" for the person with the crisis in broadcasting the issue and inviting recommendations for solutions (e.g. "My friend's losing his house, under his mortgage..."). This would get around having to disclose to hundreds your personal problem and would invite friends to pool in their personal networks and collective knowledge to help solve a crisis. I can see this working across realms like finance, health, relationships, depression, and beyond.

How will such an app make money? Contextual ads relevant to the problems (therapists, emergency loans, etc.) could be one solution. Perhaps the person with the problem could suggest a payment reward to anyone who helps them solve a problem when appropriate (e.g. "I'll pay 18% interest if anyone can loan me $10,000 for 6 months," or "$1000 if someone can find me a job or a new roommate.") But perhaps this won't apply to "I am severely depressed and just can't get out of it" types of crises.

It would be very interesting to experiment with such a model, and I think that tapping your daily feed to see what sort of things you can help your friends with would be extremely fulfilling. Perhaps you could reward people with points, but this would be a more methodical channel for those who just like to help out everyone whenever they can - to be pinged with a crisis that anyone in their network may have.

If this ever took off, it could actually help solve lots of personal problems, even bring people closer together (and hopefully make good money!).

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Body Language Secrets for Attracting Woman

When it comes to the skill of how to attract women maximum of us fall back. But it is not tough at all. Neither it depends on your look, nor on the amount of bucks in your wallet and neither does it depend on your age. It's something different and the actual thing that attracts girls is your communication skill. It gets lots crazier than that, however.  Communication after all is how we tend to discuss with others, right? However what would you say if it is told to you that ninetieth of our day-to-day communication is completed in an exceedingly method where you don't have to be compelled to speak at all?  Yes, this is right. The bulk of what we tend to communicate doesn't even return from our mouths.

This ninetieth of communication is termed body language.  Even after we aren't talking, we tend to are perpetually sending off these ‘signals' that others, girls particularly, obtain subconsciously. If you see somebody walking with their hands in their pockets and their head down, can you be additional seemingly to approach this person?  Or would you be additional seemingly to approach someone with their head up and shoulders thrown back?

The greatest issue concerning modifying your body language is that the results are virtually instant.  From the instant you begin using them you begin feeling higher concerning yourself and other people are additional seemingly to approach you. Let's bring up the ways of presenting body language secrets that how to attract women and it really works.

Nervous guys are perpetually fidgety and jerky. Assured men who are successful with girls build terribly controlled movements.  They walk slowly and solely build controlled movements. You'll never see an assured man with restless leg syndrome or wiggling with their fingers.  By slowing down your movement you're presenting to the remainder of the globe an additional "comfortable" version of yourself and it causes you to that far more approach-friendly. Once you are sitting up or in any variety of position that isn't standing up, lay back and relax.  Let your arms droop down at your sides, and build yourself as snug as you probably will. Girls have a bent of "shielding" themselves from others by sitting forward with their arms folded.  Don't try this because it causes you to look closed off. In any state of affairs, perpetually take up the maximum amount house as attainable. This is often a "territorial" issue that every one folks notice subconsciously.  If folks see you usurping this house they'll automatically assume you to be the alpha within the area which you're the one who the foremost is laid back and fun.

Once you are walking it's important to own nice posture. Walk together with your back straight, together with your head tilted up simply a little.  Stick your chest out and produce your shoulders back. It also gives the image to the girls that you are also attracted to her. Take a glance at any millionaire, rock star, or celebrity.  They perpetually walk this fashion and it's as a result of they're assured with themselves. Once you are approaching girls stand or sit with your palms slightly exposed with your arms at your sides and with your legs shoulder width apart.  Don't ever cross your arms or your legs as this is often an indication for being "closed" off. You never need to point out to a lot of emotion at any given time; this causes you to appear as if you aren't up to the mark of your life or your state of affairs. Whereas this is often technically speaking that tonality is additional body language then anything. People who speak quickly are typically left within the mud as a result of they either discusses with quick for folks to grasp or are embarrassing to speak too. Talking slower permits you to be additional up to the mark of what you say, it conjointly stops you from creating embarrassing mistakes like stuttering that may be a large sign of being nervous!

If you'll master each of these body language principles then you'll be in an exceedingly utterly totally different league with how to talk to girls and you will master in the skills of how to find a girlfriend.

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